Disturbing how rare it is to hear those words from a guy.

Before people think I’m suggesting all guys are rapists, I’m not. I’m not talking about sex. I’m talking about the bit before that when someone first comes onto you.

The other week I had been hanging out with guy for about 4 days and on the 4th evening he kissed me. Later I said to him I was surprised he’d waited 4 days to try anything if he liked me but he said he hadn’t felt anything back from me until that day and likes girls to be willing participants when they get with him, you know as in actually want to kiss him too. And it was so oddly surprising to hear him say that.

And he was right. There had been some times in the days before that where I’d thought he might try something and it made me uncomfortable as I hadn’t worked out whether I liked him that way yet (he had a beard, I don’t like beards, it confused me so I needed time!).

And had he tried anything on those other occasions it would probably have been dreadful as I wasn’t fully in yet but people don’t generally seem to stop to consider if the other person actually wants the same.

Especially if you’re in bars a lot of the time there seems to be no consideration from those hitting on people as to whether the other person actually wants to kiss them too.

Even if you have given no indication of being interested in the other person they still go for it. They just think about what they want.

But wouldn’t it be so much nicer if the other person actually really wanted that kiss too?